Do you know your purpose? Do you know what you really want to do?
Two very simple questions, but the average person find difficulty in answering them. Why?
My belief based on my own experience is that we live in a world of too much noise and input. We receive information on how we should be living our lives from everywhere, whether it be our school systems, the government, television, news and entertainment, social media and / or just our surrounding environments.
I have found that a world of too many inputs causes the population to compare their journeys with everyone else’s. The problem with that is that no two people are alike in their mission, vision, purpose or what brings them a sense of fulfillment.
Here is how Ernest Hemingway puts it:
“There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self”.
Now there’s a quote that absolutely hits the nail on the head.
While people are not only forgetting to add fulfillment to their own lives, they are comparing themselves to everyone else at the same time. That is a recipe for depression, anxiety and overwhelm.
This is also true for people who’ve already accepted their purpose and are on their mission. Comparison happens at all stages and to all people. That is, until they fall into their natural state of flow.
So, how do you stay in your own lane and do your own thing without comparing yourself to anyone else? And what about the people who haven’t found their lane yet and are still comparing themselves to others? How do we live in a state of non-comparison and intentionally drive our own “car”?
Let’s look at this in it’s different stages
Comparing yourself to others poses three major issues:
It paralyzes you creatively– The closing of the chest, the anxiousness of the mind and the overwhelming feeling that you’re not where you’re supposed to be, is basically, well, a shitty feeling and an overall way of being. The problem with comparison as it relates to your creative side is that you begin to look at what’s resonating with others instead of innovating from your own core. Other people are creating from something they are relating to. If you don’t do the same, you’ll really be inefficient, distracting and meaningless with your message and your output.
It decreases motivation– yes, on the contrary to popular belief, it decreases your motivation because then you’re trying to take someone else’s path. If your motivation isn’t tied to your purpose and what you want to be doing with your life, or how you want to be helping others, then you will not see your dreams or vision come to reality, period. You will most likely quit.
Different chapters– That is, people will often compare their chapter one to someone’s chapter twenty. You have no idea how much time, energy or money the person you are comparing to has gone through in order to get to where they are now. If you’re watching from the sidelines than you have no point of reference. Looking at someone’s chapter twenty will only discourage you from focusing on what you have to do now to get to chapter two, three, whatever.
The good news?
There is a way to stay in your own lane and do your own thing. This goes for you too, newbies!
I use an internal audit process that seems to work for me and others. It will not only help you stay in your own lane, but put the pedal to the metal so you understand a core place to operate from.
How do you think you should be living?
Let’s start here before anything else. Why? Well, because you need to know where it is you want to go, how you want to be living your day to day and what type of activities will be filling those days.
Define what your days look like so when you start diving into what you should be doing with them, you’ll see how they play into a bigger picture for yourself. See, when you look at other people and compare, you’re also saying you’d like their life. Well, do you? You don’t even know what’s going on behind the scenes of other people, so just focus on your own shit and go from there.
What lights you up?
This is what most likely comes naturally to you. And you may not know it, but the things that are easiest for you, are not for countless other people, hence, there’s a business proposition in there as well.
What are you good at?
Ask yourself this,
“Was there ever a time you found yourself saying, “Oh, that’s easy! Anyone can do that! That’s so easy!”
Actually, no it’s not easy to everyone, it’s easy to you! Remember that. Furthermore, how does that skill-set or talent apply to the thing you’re excited about whether it be a cause, a market you can help or company you can add value to?
Again, what’s easy for you and what lights you up, puts you in the exact lane you should be driving in.
What do you dislike doing?
You better figure this out real quick. Yet another great reason to not compare yourself to anyone else is because you don’t want to find yourself doing stuff you don’t like. In fact, that’s a waste of time.
Now, please don’t get me wrong. I’m not talking about forgoing the work just because you don’t like it. What I am saying is that you need to figure out what you don’t like doing so once you’re in a place to do so, you can implement resources to take over the initial work you started.
We live in a time of unbelievable technological advantages that there is a solution to almost anything we dislike doing or don’t do well in general. Find out what those things are and move them off your plate.
See, one of the things that “comparison” robbed me of a long time ago is time. I wanted to do what others were doing without understanding they had processes. Because I was comparing myself to them, I thought I had to just do A LOT of work. Wrong! All wrong! You have to work smarter, not harder.
By doing your own thing and understanding your own talents and your own needs, you can quickly figure out what you should be doing and what you should be delegating. Comparison to others won’t help you one bit here.
Design Your Own Destiny
When I decided it was time to take control of my own personal and financial freedom my intuition told me to find mentors who had already achieved what I wanted to achieve and learn from them.
That is exactly what I did and today I can look back at the best decision I have made and confirm that my mentors where the best I could have chosen.
See for yourself and who knows… they could just have what you need to design your own destiny on your terms.